On her first day as a full-time reporter, Bubbles lands in jail with a murder suspect named Crazy Popeye, who grants Bubbles an exclusive interview shortly before keeling over herself. Suddenly, Bubbles's interview notes are a hot commodity among a romance-obsessed police detective, a Polish Mafioso, and a podiatrist on the lam. Meanwhile, her longtime boyfriend, Steve Stiletto, asks if she'll pose as his fiancé in order to stave off an overseas job transfer. When he plunks a Harry Winston rock on Bubbles's finger, only the specter of an all-you-can-eat pierogi wedding buffet down at the Polish-American Club, the inevitable result if her mother LuLu finds out, stops Bubbles from blurting out "Yes!"